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From time to time, I have these moments, that I once believed was “just me” when on the outside I appear to “have it together” and a smile on my face, but on the inside I’m SCREAMING. I love my children deeply, but some days I don’t feel like being an adult, or a mother for that matter.  Some days I miss being able to take a shower without little hands pulling the shower curtain back just to make sure I didn’t go too far.  Or to simply sit on the toilet without the both of them joining me as if I need moral support.  Some days I just want to lay in bed all day, watching adult t.v. shows (remember I’m a fan of ratchet t.v.) and eating a full plate without half of my food being eaten by the littles that suddenly become hungry again after their two plates.  Some days having the sole responsibility for how two other people end up is a bit much.   Even as I have these thoughts and type them, a part of me feels guilty.  Is this normal? Should I feel this way? What about those “perfect” moms?  At times I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to be a “good mom”. I don’t necessarily feel like it came “natural” to me.  Shoot…half the time I’m making things up as I go.  The crazy part about it is, despite feeling this way at times, when the children are away, I have no clue what to do or I’m instantly eager to have them come back.  The plus side, is they have no idea mommy doesn’t know what the heck she’s doing.  They have no idea about my sleepless nights or the planning that’s involved in trying to have a smooth evening after school.  So even on my “worst” day as a mom, I’m still their mommy and they believe I’m the only one that can drive this ship.  So I began to pray and the Lord reminded me that He’s got me and them. He reminded me of when I sat at Planned Parenthood when I just found out I was expecting my first born (I will share that experience another time), that if I trust in Him, he will always have her, that WE would lack for nothing.  To this day, God has not went back on that word.  Now I may have my “whoa me” moments, but we lack for nothing.  As I scrolled down my Facebook news feed, I saw this quote on My Motherboard page and I was inspired to share the thoughts of a Real Mother.

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