I have a sarcastic sense of humor.
I love all things ice cream.
I can be extremely silly at times.
I love to dance.
When I sing, I sing loudly (and sometimes wrong lol)
When I love, I love hard.
I can have a bad attitude at times.
I have a problem with letting things go (Which I told you in my post Blessed And Unbothered)
I have insecurities.
Sometimes I speak out of turn.
I can forgive, but I struggle with the “forget”
These are just a few things that make me, me. The good, the bad and the ugly. Each piece put together uniquely design who you are getting to know…Katesha. As I get older, more of me, is revealed to me. I’m beginning to learn that although I’ve been me for 33 (almost 34 AHHH!!) years, there is still a lot that I am learning about myself. Every time that I think I have overcome something, I am quickly proved wrong and tasked with getting over and/or through it all over again.
Ever since I wrote the post about learning to let things go and not allowing “them” to bother me, I have been tested in this area constantly. Each time the test has been targeted in different areas of my life, which causes me to process and deal with each differently. I’ve learned that I internalize a lot. I really only open up to a very, I mean very, few people. Mainly because I like to deal with things on my own, but also because I do not want to have to process the opinions of others on top of my own which essentially end up confusing me more. Now I know that this may sound like a bit of an oxymoron as I am always telling others to open up and talk about it. But sometimes it is just easier to not say anything at all, speaking of me here.
I’ve really been working, or attempting to work on perfecting me in this season. I put a quote on my vision board that states ” I’m good at being me, but I want to become a better me”. I may have paraphrased that since it’s not in front of me at the moment, but I hope you get the gist lol. I’m finding that there is a lot of me that I just don’t like and that’s not always a good feeling. But in order to reach the ultimate goal of becoming more like Christ I have to deal with it, as ugly as it may be at times. And maybe, just maybe, that is what I find to be the most difficult part, looking at the (wo)man in the mirror, peeling off the layers that can no longer be attached to me.
I have a shirt that I love to wear that says “I’m fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalms 139:14), but question have I really dissected what that means to me personally…until now. I was made in His own image and He designed every intricate part of me, so why not embrace it, right? I have to learn to embrace every part of me, every season of life and when I hit the difficult parts, turn to Him to remove them or direct me on how to correct them. It’s just as simple as that. The road may not always be easy in this journey called life, but the pruning season(s) is(are) necessary in order for me to live out and walk in my purpose.
This is a day by day thing girlfriends, and I pray that you will take the time to evaluate yourself, just as I am. It is needed and something that we have to do to in order to remain humble and display/share the love of Christ to others.
He who gains wisdom and good sense loves (preserves) his own soul; He who keeps understanding will find good and prosper. Proverbs 19:8 AMP
Peace & Blessings,
(Photo Cred: http://andoutofsmallthings.com/one-step-to-become-who-you-are-meant-to-be/)